Monday, March 28, 2011


Attachments........ we form them, with no effort.......attachments to others, to our pets, our cars, our stuff! Most of us latch on, and refuse to let go! That is a lesson I am trying to teach myself......let go, don't attach.

It started back in the winter, I had some of my mom's clothing......nothing I would wear, just hanging on to it because it was hers. I finally pulled it out of my closet one day, folded everything neatly and place it in bags for charity. I began to realize, the stuff was not my connection to my mother, my memories are the connecting blocks. Last summer I did the same thing with books, went through my shelves and gave many of my books away.

As we continue to renovate the house, the barn and the creative space, I am still dealing with attachments. Letting go of stuff can be quite painful, whether it is physical or emotional. But I do have boxes that I am filling up, then I will let nieces and nephews get what they want, and once again give to charity.

In the back of my closet I found a dress my dad had bought me, it is not something I would wear now, but it is vintage and I will see if my twenty year old niece wants it. As I am trying so hard to let go, Rick and his family are sorting out his mom's belongings. It is tough, I know that feeling of wanting to hang on to everything because it was your mom's or dad's.
But there is this incredible freeing sensation to let go also..........the memories are there and the stuff you choose to keep should really be special.

I never thought of myself as a pack rat, but going through cupboards and closets, it is pretty
obvious I am......every day as I meditate, I tell myself to let's getting easier.
I think maybe there are many of us who are pack rats, who think, well I'll use that someday,
I might need that sometime, and the next thing we know, our closets are bursting at the seams.

A good friend who years ago, lost all her belongings in a fire, told me that at first it is devastating, but then it becomes quite freeing to be rid of stuff. I hope I never have to live through that extreme, but I do find myself more and more, looking at things around me, I really need that, do I really want that?

This will be a post that will have post scripts the rest of the summer, or at least until all the renovations are done......will let you know how the process continues.......I think there will be some painful withdrawals, and maybe a few celebrations, but it really is time to rethink my attachments.


  1. When my daughter was trying to de-clutter her house, we came across some board games she had saved since she was a child. She needed more room for other things so she reluctantly decided to get rid of them.
    I took them downstairs and took a bunch of pictures of the boards and the pieces before throwing them out. Then I surprised her with the pictures later. She was happy to have that reminder of the games she had loved so much.

    Each time I move, I move into a smaller home so I have had to pare down my posessions. Your friend is right. It is nice to not have a lot of things to take care of.

  2. Great post and thoughts. I am about to attempt to spring clean and needed this encouragement:)

  3. I do understand. Had the same conversation with myself the past few years with all of our parents' stuff. Some is easy to keep, some is in the middle and some I just want to go...but then I think...what, um...

    I have never been a collector of anything other then things belonging to my children and they will one day take that along with them, but the amount of stuff given to us in the past few years. Whew.

    I can't wait to see the renovations -or hear about them. Very exciting!

  4. Great post. I really enjoyed it, and you are quite right. We all do hang on to things. Sometimes we just have to clear out. I loved your comment that the stuff wasn't the link to your mum. It's your memories that are the connecting blocks. I thought that was lovely. Wasn't that a good idea what Belle did for her daughter with those games.

  5. Jilda, moving into a 3 room (tiny) cottage makes you really clean house and get rid of a lot or else put it into storage. And my new rule is if I haven't used it or needed it in 3 years, I can part with it. Bruce on the other hand.......

  6. It is most likely easy to say, or to write - let it go. Sometimes it is so hard just to take the step. Especially if you are having links with some some dear. But well done Jilda and keep the right vibe!

  7. Jilda this was such a timely post that hits home to so many of us and I really enjoyed it and will share it with others. I also liked the comment by our good friend Belle and that was a sweet thing she did taking pictures for her daughter of the things she once loved so much.
    I was having fun this morning listing to you and and the guys singing "Barbeque" on youtube. That is a really cute song especially if you don't live up north. Have a great week and keep writing good stuff to keep us straight.

  8. I have a building full of "stuff". Lenny said the other day that a fire might be a good idea! I am considering hiring a huge dumpster and some friends to spend a day or week going through it and getting rid of everything that can't be donated.

    When my husband died I got rid of his clothes the first month because I couldn't stand seeing them hanging there and knowing he'd never be back to wear them, but I did keep one of his white cotton t-shirts that had survived the laundry. That shirt helped me sleep, and when I moved from our house, I laundered that shirt and gave it to Goodwill in a box of my old clothes.

  9. There is a liberating feeling when I have a good clearout.

  10. Boy...that is me!! I need to get rif of so much "stuff"!! And so much of it definately is just a mental connection! And then there is thinking I will one day be THAT size again...ha! Thanks for making me see that and helping me spring clean!!