One Breath At A Time

Do we understand the word exhaustion?  Two days of chakra study and postures, I am very tired.
Intense two days, intense weekend.
Last night a full moon, tonight, pouring rain.......a good night for sleep and rest.
The calendar is jammed the next few weeks, so I remember what my friend Claude says when I asked him how do you do it all?  Claude's answer, "one breath at a time."
So tonight, as I looked at my day planner for October,  I wrote on several of the pages.......
ONE BREATH AT A TIME!

Goodnight, Sweet dreams

Teacher Is Taught

Today has been a day of transformation for me in many ways.  I said goodbye to my friend Rosemary,
her memorial service was beautiful and uplifting and a celebration of her life.
I received a most exquisite hand drawn card from a good friend in Arizona who is an amazing artist, and is having serious health issues himself.  The note explained that the card held an endless supply of hugs, and that anytime I needed one to help myself.

I went to my first yoga training since my treatments started.  I can't lie, my body is shaking, the nausea is coming in waves, my head is throbbing.......but it was so important to me to do this.
I needed to spend my time with one of my closest friends, Jackie, I needed to see what my body is still capable of doing.  I knew going in, it would not be easy.......and we will see what tomorrow night brings.

At the beginning of class, we had to introduce ourselves and be honest about where/what was taking place in our lives.  I kept it short......I am a yoga teacher at an addiction center, I work also with PTSD active military, a singer/songwriter and that I had always considered myself a healer.....but my body was failing me, and it seemed I could not heal myself.  The teacher spent the next several minutes telling me about focusing my energy on my healing and not everyone else's......that I had reached a place in my life where I had to spend energy on me and not those around me.  WOW......a little transformation information for me!!!!!

My friend and I went to dinner after the class, we talked openly and honestly for a long time.
We both needed this class, this time together.  A FaceBook friend had posted this unknown quote today,   "Some people come into your life just to teach you how to let go."  Considering my day,
that post spoke straight to my heart.
Goodnight, Sweet dreams

Retirement

My sister Pat retired from her job today.  Rick and I went to her party and met all her co-workers.
I sat and watched her, laughing and chatting with all her friends.  I am excited for her, she is 69 and looks like she is in her 50's.   I am so happy for her.....her life has not always been easy, and she has worked hard.  In two weeks she is taking a cruise up the east coast with several of her friends, I pray that these next few years are ones of enjoyment and good health for her.

She and Rick keep telling me it is time for me to think about retirement.......not quitting they say, just quit the time clock and do what I want.  That is such a scary concept for me, I have worked all my life.  My parents signed a work permit for me when I was 15, I have worked ever since, and quite often two jobs at a time.  I know in the back of their heads, (Rick and my sister, Pat) they are thinking of my health.  It hit me a few weeks back, here I am undergoing these treatments, seeing all these doctors, and I have changed nothing......well, I do take more naps......and it made me remember the old saying about insanity " keep doing the same thing, expecting change" well, you know what I mean.

Today really made me think, watching Pat, listening to all her plans, seeing the excitement in her eyes.
But, it is a big leap.......I guess I'll know when I'm ready to jump.......

Greetings and Regrets

Sometimes, I forget what I teach......mainly.....no expectations.  But that is hard, even for an old yoga teacher.  Rick and I had applied for a performing slot at a songwriter's festival that is coming up in November.  We got the "greetings and regrets" note this evening.   Why are we so downhearted? We have played this particular festival a couple of times in the past, we loved it.....and honestly, I so wanted one more shot at it.  I have to remember, when I do this stuff,  NO EXPECTATIONS!  Then, if it works out, great and if not, no big deal.

As singer/songwriters, we have gotten a zillion "greetings and regrets" letters through the years.
Why do we keep on?  Because of days like this past Sunday, when you see people's faces light up as they listen to your music, when they walk up to you with tears in their eyes telling you how much your music meant to them.  When you know in your heart that what you do is good.  But, it is still about that acceptance thing isn't it?  We want to be accepted, by strangers and by our peers, by our friends and family.

"Greetings and regrets",   a cold and proper form letter, sent to dozens.....maybe hundreds.  Who wrote it? Did they think about how it would sound when the person who received it read it?  I know, nothing personal.  Well, it is better than being told by a "friend" that your song sucked.  Guess what, that same song.....was the one that brought tears to people's eyes Sunday.  We all have an opinion don't we?

So, will we resubmit next year?  I doubt it.  Life really is getting to be too short to deal with those who vex the spirit, life is too short to let other's judgments cause you grief.  Life is too short for "greetings and regrets."

Call A Friend

I met my best friend Kaye today, we did our quarterly, girl's day. (though Rick did join us for lunch)
We met up at the hair salon, got all beautiful, then went to the mall for awhile and shopped.
She is getting ready to go on safari.......I love that word, safari.  Actually, I have a couple of friends who are going on safari soon.  That word seems so romantic, so exotic.  I loved the movie, Out of Africa.  I think I would like to go on safari.  Olive and khaki are good colors for me. Ha,ha!

We went to Blackrock Grill for lunch, one of my favorite places to eat.  Really cool atmosphere, and most importantly, great food. Shrimp po'boys were out of this world, with sweet potato fries.....and lots of cold ice tea.  Yummy!

I came home, and painted our front doors, a fresh coat of paint makes everything sparkle.  Of course,
they are purple......is there any other color for a front door?

It has been a very good day......and I am grateful.  So far, the meds are working, the nausea is being held at bay, headaches aren't too bad, much better week than last.  Good days are appreciated, more than ever.  We are having perfect fall weather, cool nights, and glorious sunny days.  I must say "I am grateful" a 100 times a day, can't help myself......most days I am giddy with appreciation of all my blessings.

If you haven't spent time with an old friend lately, I suggest you do it soon.  If you are middle age or older, this is the time you have spent your whole life waiting for.......it's now or never.
Do those things you keep saying "some day"......remember that is code for never.
Pick up the phone, call a friend.

Sacred Circle

It seemed that everyone who came into my class today at work, was upset......sad, depressed, angry.
As they all walked into the room, you could fee the angst.  I decided to toss out the lessons I had planned for today, and followed my heart.

I had everyone pair up, back to back for breathwork.  When you are  down and troubled, nothing like back to back breathing makes you aware that someone has your back.  The mood begin to lift.
We moved into heart opening postures, opening the chest and heart more and more with each stretch.
We closed with a sacred circle.  We all place our mats in a circle, heads pointed inward, and we began to breathe and relax.  As we lay in that circle, breathing, you could feel a blanket of peace spread across the room.  No one wanted to leave, that little room felt like the safest place in the world today, and there was no doubt that all who came to class felt the love that was there.

I wish I could bottle those moments, they are sacred......those times when the broken spirits of those who feel so unloved, realize they are loved, that they can feel peace.  I keep reminding them, we are all worthy of love, we are all connected, we are all worthy of peace and joy.  I can count on my hand the number of times that I have done that sacred circle in my classes at work, few groups that I teach there seem to make that leap, that connection.  Today, the pain was so intense, I knew in my heart that everyone in the room needed to make that connection, to feel love and peace in an extraordinary way.
Tonight, as you read this blog, I send you more blessings, blessings of love, of peace and joy.

Rekindle

In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit. 
Albert Schweitzer 


My inner fire has gone out many many times, and has been rekindled by some who knew they were igniting my flame and some who never realized they had lit a dying ember.  I try to let everyone in my life know how much they mean to me, to tell them how much I love them.  Thanks to all of you, who leave your comments, who inspire me, who send me notes of encouragement, and thanks for rekindling my inner spirit.

Blessings of love, joy and peace to each and every one of you tonight.

Goodbye Rosemary

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.......it was just that kind of day.  I got up this morning full of excitement, our songwriter's group was performing today.  It was a crisp fall morning, full of anticipation and good energy.  The phone rang about 9:30 and I didn't recognize the name on caller ID.  Rick answered the call, it was for me.  It was my chair buddy Rosemary's daughter Tina......I could tell by her voice that something was terribly wrong.

Tina and Christa, Rosemary's daughters, called to tell me that their mom had passed away Friday morning.  As Tina gave me the details, I kept thinking this is not right, this can't be true.  Rosemary's vitals were good, her numbers were up......but she took her last breath Friday morning.

It is the curse of those damn green chairs.....it is their legacy.  To beat their curse, takes incredible strength, the willingness to fight, and the grace of the angels.  I knew when I spoke with Rosemary the last time, even though the numbers were good, there was no fight left in her.  She had battled too much pain, and even though she knew she was loved and would be missed, she did not want to fight the fight any more.

Rosemary was only four years older than me, she had raised her family, worked as a caregiver all her life in a nursing facility.  She was sweetness and good, and filled with love.....and sitting with her in those green chairs made it bearable.  Everytime we talked, we told each other how much we loved each other, she was my friend and I felt as though I had known her my whole life.  I feel so cheated that she was in my life for such a short time.  Life beat me up this morning, and her children and grandchildren have lost way more than me.

Our gig was one of the best ever today, a big crowd, and we all did good.  I didn't feel like singing, but I knew Rosemary would be angry with me if I had sat at home and cried.  I will miss her so much, her smile, and her kindness.....damn those green chairs, they won again.
RIP Rosemary

Welcome Fall

Welcome Fall, my most favorite time of the year!  We built a fire in our fire pit this afternoon, using wood from one of our old apple trees that was blown down by a storm.  The sweet smoky smell of that apple wood burning, the brilliance of the sky and a little crispness in the air.......fall is here.

I know that for many spring energizes, but for me fall gives me the boost I have needed all summer.
Suddenly I have the urge to "feather" my nest, to spruce things up a bit.  Looking for a new sofa, new paint colors, and a kitchen remake......I am sure that Rick wishes I would hibernate.  Ha!
It's not just me, several of our friends are wanting to "feather" their nests too.

Tomorrow we welcome fall with an outdoor concert.  Rick and I, and a few of our songwriting friends are doing a show for our Community Foundation.  The show will be at the Bankhead House,
yes, the house where Tallulah was was raised by her grandmother.  My favorite Tallulah quote,
"only good girls keep diaries, bad girls don't have time."  Maybe Tallulah's spirit will visit while we are there.

Another reason that I love fall, fresh apples and grapes.  I must admit the fall fruits I have sampled so far, have been outstanding.  Wishing you all a beautiful cool fall weekend!
Good night, sweet dreams

National Tradesmen Day

September 21, National Tradesmen Day.......my father was a plumber and a coal miner, my younger brother and his son are plumbers, I am proud of them all. I think our national obsession with college degrees has cost us.  There was a time in in this country when being skilled, when being a tradesmen, was honorable.  When working with your hands was just as important as being a doctor or a lawyer.

A college education is not for everyone.  Working in a rehab center I hear people often say they became doctors, lawyers, etc because their families wanted them too, and they have lived unhappy lives because of it.  Being a good plumber, a good carpenter, a good builder of cars, a good welder,
those are jobs and careers that are most important to the foundation of this country.  Being educated is important, reading, writing, math, basic foundations of math and science, we all need those.....and as much as we need people with college degrees, we need those with skills.

It seems that earning a living by the sweat of your brow is just a job, but farmers, builders, electricians, all those that have life skills, we need them.  I think we need to encourage young people to truly look at what they love to do, if they are good with their hands, if they love to build, to solve problems,
(and if you don't think a leaky faucet is a problem, wait until you have one) then let them become tradesmen and be proud of their skills.  We had a new roof put on our house last year, the crew of men who cut and placed that tin was amazing.  Each knew their job so well, it was like watching a well choreographed dance as they replaced our roof.

Our carpenter, Ray is seventy and honestly, I worry about what we will do when he is no longer able to work.  He is incredible, and no matter what project I ask of him, he can do it.  I know of no one who will be able to take his place.  We have been looking for a stone mason for weeks, we have now decided to get a video and see what we can do.  We actually found one in our area, but he has a two month waiting list.  My brother, has a two week waiting list, unless it is truly an emergency.

So today, I want to say thanks to all the Tradesmen, those who have the skills that so few of us do.
Thanks to the ones who can roof, who can build, who can plumb, who can keep our electricity on,
who do all those thankless jobs......thank you, you are the ones who are the true foundation of this country.

The Fear of Being Wrong

" To live a creative life, we must lose our fear of being wrong."  - Joseph Chilton Pearce


We all know someone who had rather die than be wrong, who would give up family and friends to prove themselves right.  I figure I have probably been wrong more times than right, but that is ok.
Not sure how it came about, but I figured out a long time ago, it was alright to be wrong.
Maybe my lean toward all things artistic and creative helped me to reach that place.

I know that living a creative life also means that many will disagree with you, some will be envious,
and others will begrudge any good that comes your way.  That's ok too.

This has been a very difficult week for me, rest does not come easy, even at my weakest.
These lessons that are being taught to me, are hard......and I struggle.  A wonderful sweet friend called me today, she has faced much worse than I have the past few years, but she told me something wonderful.......that she had perfected the art of resting on the sofa......and she encouraged me to do the same.  She reminded me that I was at a place where I had nothing to prove, that it was time for joy and pleasure.  She is right.

So tonight, I urge you all to lose your fear of being wrong,  and to perfect the art of resting on the sofa.
Goodnight, Sweet dreams

Treatment #8

Rick snapped a photo of me today, waiting to get my drip in the infamous GREEN CHAIR.  It was chilly today so I carried my nice red warm fuzzy blanket with me.  It had been a rough night, sorry for not posting yesterday, the bouts of nausea are getting worse.

It was not a bad day in the green chair as those days go.  I had asked Rick if he would bring a case of his books with us and let the nurses pass them around to anyone who wanted one.  Everyone wanted one.  Rick was a rock star in the infusion room today, they all wanted him to sign their books.

I explained to Rick how much that simple gesture helped all of us today.  Simple acts of kindness take on gigantic proportions in the green chairs.  To talk and laugh, and just for a little while to forget why you are in those chairs is pure magic.   Even the nurses got in on the laughter today.  None of us in those green chairs felt so great this morning, but I think by the end of treatment, we all felt a little better.  We try to encourage each other, to eat, to drink plenty of water, to hang on.  Hang on, that has become my way of coping, it is not easy to talk about my illness, I don't want the illness to become my identity.  So when someone asks how I am doing, I just say I am hanging on.

Everyone keeps asking when will the treatments end, I don't know.......they are open ended......they end when they end.  We are playing a gig Sunday for our local Community Foundation, one of the nurses is coming to hear us.  I know that nurses do their jobs, but I am telling you, the three that are in that infusion room have to have wings and golden crowns.  Their kindness brings tears to my eyes sometimes......but it is often easy to have tears in those green chairs.  As usual I have slept most of the day, there is still a residue of nausea tonight, but nothing like last.  My list of foods to eat is getting shorter, after you toss your cookies, that's one more to remove from the list.  Ha,Ha, sorry that might have been TMI.

So now you know what the green chair looks like, to just look at the photo, it seems innocent doesn't it?  Just a normal green recliner.......if those chairs could talk, the stories they know, the people who have sat in them........those chairs are equalizers, they don't play favorites.  They are the most powerful chairs in the world, they hold life and death in their cushions.  Just a green chair.....who knew?

Change In The Air

Change is in the air, rains have swept across our area today.....heavy torrential downpours.
By Wednesday, fall will make its first official visit, lows in the 40's.
It didn't take the weatherman to tell me about the change, all day, in every class students have complained about aches.........headaches, backache, shoulders, knees, hands.  When the atmospheric
pressure begins to change, our bodies shout it out loud and clear.

So what can you do, as the seasons change and your body screams......slow down, get extra rest,
warm baths and showers, make sure you continue to eat healthy fresh food, lots of water and as the temperature drops.....hot tea, your choice, green, herbal or black with honey.  And even though the weather gets iffy, with the rain and the cold.......move!  I love walking in the rain (I have a 15 year old LLBean raincoat that keeps me bone dry)  go to the mall and walk, take the stairs, go to yoga class.....do not hibernate!

The changing of the seasons serves to remind us that life is change and for each change there is a reason.  Nature needs a break, the shorter days, colder temps give plants and animals the opportunity to rest, to nourish themselves, to slow down and enjoy the shorter days and longer nights.  Eat seasonal foods, apples, root vegetables, greens, citrus fruit, sweet squash, yams, nuts......foods that are meant to nourish your body for fall and winter.  What could be better than sweet crunchy apples right off the tree?

Don't dread the coming seasons of fall and winter, embrace them......savor the chill in the air, the wind in your face, the crystal blue of the skies, and the vivid color of the foliage.  Be grateful for the seasons, where ever you may live, let them serve as reminders that life is change.

Songs

Our music "think tank" met today.  For a singer/songwriter it is Nirvana.....our genres are so different, but the love, the creativity dwells in our hearts.  I have thought about the songs I heard this afternoon.
I also thought about what a horrible world it would be without music.

We all have a rhythm, a heartbeat that runs through our soul.  It is the thread that connects us to music.  When you think about your memories, good and bad, think about how many of them in some way connect to a song.  One of my very first musical  memories......my younger brother Ricky ( he was about 2) singing the song Honeycomb.   My first musical performance.......I was six, my mom had taken me to the beauty shop to have my waist length hair chopped and permed into a poodle cut.
(no joke)  I sat under the hair dryer singing at the top of my lungs, thinking no one could hear me.

Songs have etched such strong deep memories in our brains, tattoos of brief moments that for whatever reason are important to us.  I grew up in a Pentecostal church, the music was the energy and driving force for those charismatic services.  Music has been used to ready soldiers for battle, for celebrations, for death, and for love.  No matter where you are in the world, you can recognize a familiar song and not feel so alone.

Songs tell stories, inspire, uplift, and can show the dark underbelly of civilization.  We Shall Overcome was a battle cry, the Beatles's Yesterday a poignant longing, The Doors Light My Fire, an invitation to a sexual revolution.  Through every decade, songs have connected hearts, broken them and healed them.
Since the beginning of time, when man danced around a fire, pounding on primitive drums,and chanting......songs/music has been a part of our lives.

So, if there are singer/songwriters in your area, support their talents......go listen, let them tell their musical stories.....they wrote them, no one can do them  more honestly. And who knows, one day Rick and I may be in your town, letting you hear our songs, our musical stories.  For tonight, think of your favorite song, and then think of why you love it so much.

Vinegar Magic

I had shared a link on FB a couple of days ago about the uses of apple cider vinegar.  I am astounded by the notes and comments that I got.  My whole life we used cider vinegar for dozens of different
things.  Got indigestion?  cider vinegar and water  Arthritis? honey, cider vinegar and water.....bug bites, sprains, muscle aches.....we must have used gallons of the stuff!

I still drink a couple of spoonfuls in a glass of water every day, the only time in my life that I have had indigestion......when I didn't drink my tonic.  My mom used white vinegar to clean our floors and counter tops, and soften our laundry.

We used vinegar rinses on our hair, as toners for our face.....come to think of it, Rick and I use a lot of cider vinegar and white vinegar too!  Vinegar is cheap, and if you surf the web, you will find loads of information on its uses around the home.  I have a friend who swears he has had no kidney stones since drinking cider vinegar and water daily.
Books have been written about the uses for vinegar.  It truly is an amazing product.  If you are looking at simpler products with multiple uses, I would start with vinegar.  White vinegar and a few sheets of newspapers will make your windows sparkle.   If you are concerned about the use of chemicals in your home, try vinegar.  Stopped up drains?  baking soda, then top it off with white vinegar.

Vinegar has been around for centuries, used for medicinal purposes to cleaning. Do some research, buy some vinegar, let me know what you think!

Princess Breeze

I got a great call tonight, my nephew James and his wife Andrea took their little family to Disney, Orlando this week......all four kids plus parents have had a blast.  Breeze who is seven, called me tonight with so much excitement in her voice it took me awhile to understand what she was saying.
They had all gone to dinner at some sort of Castle dinner theater, and it seems that  the staff there always picks a princess for the night.  Tonight, they picked Breeze.  She got a crown of course,
and a sash, and pictures  and she got memories she will never forget.

I would have loved to have been there. Her dad said as soon as they left, she told him she had to call Aunt Jilda and tell me the news.  What is it about little girls and crowns?  I too, always wanted a tiara.
I was probably as excited as Breeze, when I finally understood what she was telling me. I think that this crowning calls for a new dress, we will have to have a shopping day soon.

I have had a difficult week, not feeling my best, friends in turmoil......Breeze's call made everything better.  I told her I already knew she was a princess.  Something else about Breeze, she had waist-length beautiful rich brown hair, and last month she had it cut for locks of love.  She has a beautiful heart.  It's funny how sitting here alone tonight, (Rick was at a football game) I had really gotten down, but a phone call from Princess Breeze made my night.
If I am ever in Orlando, I am going by this Medieval Castle and tell them how they made one little girl's night so very special......maybe they'll give me a crown too. 

Beauty

Summer blooms, they know the days are getting shorter,they know their days are numbered.  Their beauty becomes more astounding every day.  These beauties greeted me at my front door today, trimmed in a ray of sunshine.  It had been a difficult
afternoon, full of sadness......I looked for beauty around every curve as I drove home, I had to know that it was still here......I knew in my heart it was.

As I got out of my car, the sun's rays peaked through the massive dogwood in our front yard, beauty blazed at my doorsteps.  I am grateful tonight, grateful that beauty is all around us.....we just have to open our eyes.

Thanksgiving Every Day

It's good to be thankful.......every day, all around me, it seems all across the United States.....all I hear are complaints. Some days, I feel as though I am drowning in a sea of whining ingrates.  Enough already!

It seems that gratitude, thankfulness has become out of fashion.  The days that I do hear someone say something positive......it's like a refreshing spring shower.  I understand that there will always be needs, wants and dissatisfaction.....maybe it is just where I live, but then the news media seems to be fanning the flames across the country.

For most of us, we have a roof over our head, food in our belly, a school for our children to go.....and yes, most of us work hard for what we have, but so did our parents and grandparents.  The difference....the ones before us were grateful.  The sense of entitlement seems to be spreading like
kudzu....I know that talking about being grateful may sound over simplistic.  I believe with all my heart "that we get what we think about, whether we want it or not." - Wayne Dyer  When we see only the lack, when we think of only our wants..... we become very childlike, and not in a good way.

Every day, before my feet touch the floor, I say a prayer of gratitude......some days it is because I have a roof over my head, some days because I can take a breath, but every day, I am grateful.  It is time to raise the vibration, to really understand that we are all connected, we are all part of the human race.
Maybe it is the fact that this is an election year, and the fear mongers are spreading fear like fertilizer on a barren garden.  Some days,  I just hurt physically from all the  spite and hate that spews from mouths. 

There will always be room for improvement, no matter where you live, where you go, what you do.......but we live on a most beautiful planet, and its beauty is in its diversity.  I am grateful to be here, to experience this life, to have met the people I have met......I have read many times, that without gratitude there is no joy.......I believe that is a true statement.  In this country, we celebrate Thanksgiving in November.....it is probably my most favorite holiday.....no gifts, no decorations,
just food, family, friends and ........gratitude.  My goal.....Thanksgiving every day.


 

Balance

Last night, one of my students told me that since she had been practicing yoga, she was amazed at how much better her balance  had become.  She mentioned that before she started yoga, she had already experienced fear of falling.  She told me that until she started yoga, she never realized that she could regain her balance.  Now this is a middle age healthy woman, not some frail little old lady.

So, I mentioned all of the above to say this......it is never too late to work on your health.  I once had a student who was able to cut his daily dose of oxygen by a third after he started breath work.  He was chair bound, but he did arm movements and breath work.

You will never appreciate having good health until yours is threatened,......and then you will understand that nothing matters without it.   I believe that we have to practice preventative medicine, and we have to educate ourselves about our bodies. I have been told over and over by those in the medical profession that my life style has kept me going.  I am a living testament to breath work and movement.

If you are beginning to struggle with balance, start rebuilding now.......stand behind a kitchen chair,
shift all your weight to your right leg, lift the left knee (hold onto the back of the chair) BREATHE, at least 5 breaths.....now do the same on the left leg/right knee..  If you are brave and fearless, take one breath, and let go of the back of the chair......it's ok to hang on, it takes practice.

Balance leaves with age, with injury, with meds, with illness.......you may never regain the balance you had as a teenager, but you can improve what you have now.  Remember, a fall can change your life forever...... a few  minutes of daily balance work can too.

Vanished

It has been a night for disappearing blogs, my first was almost done.......it vanished.
I think it was the universe's way of telling me, you're tired, you need rest.
Some nights, even though the words come, for whatever reason......they are not to be shared.
Goodnight, Sweet dreams

A Promise

Mother Nature made a promise this weekend......last night a "cold" front came through Alabama.
This morning it was 52 degrees, with crystal blue skies.....the whole world looked sparkling and new.
The promise......that fall surely will come, that the hot humid days of summer, will soon fade away and the colors, smells and cooler temps of fall are on their way.

As we walked this morning, the dogs barked for joy.....and ran with abandon.  Colors are starting to change, the morning light is different and deer are beginning to gather under our apple tree. It seems that every living thing got the memo from Mother Nature......fall will come, soon.

I am getting the urge to cozy up our house for the coming seasons, cleaning out, a fresh coat of paint,
maybe a new kitchen floor......the urge to simplify is overwhelming.  I am reminding Rick daily, the patio and fire pit will be needed soon!
Mother Nature teases, but she never lies......fall will come.....I can't wait!

Strive for Excellence, Not Perfection

One of the 28 Secrets to Happiness list that was on my blog last night........strive for excellence, not perfection.
The striving for perfection has created some of the most unhappy people I have ever known.
Through the years, I have had friends talk about their "perfect" life......life would be perfect if......
they were never happy, because nothing was never "perfect."  That striving for perfection instead of excellence created a goal that was not obtainable.  A  couple of those friends are dead now, and I think of them with great sadness.  I don't remember them ever being happy, because they never got that
"perfect" life.

I have friends today, who seek that "perfection" and when I talk with them about the absurdness of
perfection........it seems that seed of "perfection" was planted in their brains long ago and cannot be weeded out.  They will never have that face or body of perfection they seek, or the perfect marriage,
or perfect job......talking about excellence to them is futile, "perfection" is what they want.
"Perfection" is their dream.

Letting go of the drive for "perfection".......that is the release of a tremendous burden. It is refreshing to know, that having flaws (not being perfect) creates our uniqueness, that a productive happy life comes when we learn from our mistakes, that our "warts" make us interesting.  Don't you think that "perfection" would be boring, bland and dull?  My life, certainly does not come anywhere close to "perfection".......but it has never been boring, bland or dull!

If perfection is what you seek, give yourself a break.....look around and marvel at the uniqueness and imperfect beauty of nature and the world around you.  Think about all the energy you have expended on the quest for "perfection"......are you always disappointed?  a little let down?  Maybe it is time to rethink what you are striving for, and why.

Happiness

The following list is from the book, The Simple Living Guide......if you are trying to simplify your life, I suggest reading this wonderful book by Janet Luhrs.
Enjoy the list!

28 Secrets to Happiness

Live beneath your means and within your seams

Return everything you borrow

Donate blood

Stop blaming other people

Admit it when you make a mistake

Give all the clothes you haven't worn in three years to charity

Every day do something nice and try not to get caught

Listen more, talk less

Every day take a 30 minute walk in your neighborhood

Skip two meals a week and give the money to charity

Strive for excellence, not perfection

Be on time

Don't make excuses

Don't argue

Get organized

Be kind to kind people

Be even kinder to unkind people

Let someone cut ahead of you in line

Take time to be alone

Reread a favorite book

Cultivate good manners

Be humble

Understand and accept that life isn't always fair

Know when to say something

Know when to keep your mouth shut

Don't criticize anyone for 24 hours

Learn from the past, plan for the future, and live in the present

Don't sweat the small stuff

Invisible Scars

Invisible scars.......we all have them.  Some of them are deep and ugly, painful and unforgettable.

Scars that were formed when we were young and innocent, scars that were formed in our teens,and others that formed as the years passed by.

Scars that were caused by lack of love,  by monsters who thrived on emotional abuse, and scars that are self-inflicted.  Invisible scars.....usually not recognized until time has passed by.  We might find ourselves inflicting the same hurt and scars on others that we carry ourselves......we realize, sometimes too late that we have learned a sad and hurtful behavior.

Self-inflicted scars are the scariest to me.......those are the results of self-hate and loathing, the results of human souls that think they have no worth, no value.  Those that are covered in self-inflicted scars spend their lives, thinking they are not good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, talented enough......unlovable. Those scars started as probably off-handed remarks made by loved ones, sometimes well intended, or maybe not.  But, they were seeds that grew, and became wild, untamed,

rampant weeds that scarred.

Visible scars, while sad, heartbreaking and maybe frightening reminders of horrific deeds or accidents

demand to be dealt with, acknowledged if you  will.  Though they may disfigure, usually there is dialect

and revelation and the opportunity of some sort of healing process.  The ones that you can't see......how can you help, can there be closure,  any sort of healing......what can be done with the invisible scars?  Maybe they are some sort of soul tattoo, a reminder that all is not beauty, all is not love and kindness.....that the reality is......there is pain, suffering, hurt......that sometimes life really is a battlefield and we are on it, whether we want to be or not.

Losing Fears

I met a beautiful young teenage woman today, who happened to be a wonderful artist and musician.......as I looked at her art work, she began to apologize for what she thought might be flaws......I quickly assured her, it was wonderful, her creation, and that there was no need to apologize for the flaws that only she saw.  I encouraged her to pursue her art and music, the talent is there.....she just needs to lose her fear.

What if Einstein or Michelangelo had let their fears stop them?  I probably over encourage, but I spent a great deal of my life struggling with fear......it is a self-created prison, and a most difficult one to escape from.....but it can be done.  There was a part of me that was absolutely fearless, and I believed I could do anything......but there was a side where the fear lived, and as the years went by it grew.

As a teenager and young woman, I believed in myself, but through the years, I began to believe the naysayers, thank goodness, turning 50 renewed much of my self-confidence and I understood that other people fears really did not belong in my life.

Occasionally, those old fears will whisper in my ear.....and sometimes on a bad day, when maybe I don't feel so well, I listen a little too much......but thank goodness, I learned to shut the voices out.
I can still spread my wings, take a deep breath.......and on a good day, fly.

Mysterious

"The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed."   - Albert Einstein

Once again, I share another quote from Einstein.......do you think he knew his wisdom, how brilliant he truly was?

This quote especially hit home for me, I love art and I love science......and I think there is a mystery
that surrounds everything.  If you don't or haven't experience mystery in a awhile.....spend some time with a four year old child........their whole world is mysterious.

Goodnight, Sweet dreams

Good For You

I know it may have seemed a little strange to be working today.....on "Labor Day", but I am really glad I went.  Rick had a ton of writing to do, and yes, I could have stayed home and  enjoyed the rainy day.....but I decided to go in.  The students who came to class were thrilled that I came in.
We had a great class, I felt better and they did too.

If you have injuries, arthritis, and certain chronic illnesses, you know that the weather plays havoc with your body.  We had four inches of rain today according to my brother's rain gauge. My students were all achy and out of sorts.....but were much better after class.

If the weather changes affect you, gentle stretches will almost always help......start by reaching upward toward the sky, take a few breaths......then a gentle stretch side to side, and if you're seated, go ahead and twist to the right, take about five slow breaths, then twist to the left, five more breaths.
If you can stand, swing your arms loosely, side to side, about 8 times (don't forget to breathe).
Lying on your back on the bed or floor, place your hands at the back of your thighs, pull your knees toward you chest, take a few breaths.....maybe even 8 or 10 breaths.  Sit up slow, take 10 slow breaths, in and out through your nose.......don't you feel better?  Drink a glass of water, smile because you just did something really good for you!

Goodnight, Sweet dreams

Mushy Brain

I am working tomorrow, so I cooked ribs this afternoon.  We had gotten the telescope out to to look at the sky, but another line of monsoonal storms are headed toward us.  Everywhere around us, there are mushrooms, and all sorts of strange fungi......we have had a lot of rain of this week, thanks to Isaac

I wish I knew more about plants, wild ones......each time we walk, it seems we spot a plant we have never seen before.  We have an oak tree on the property that has tiny leaves the size of dimes. This week there has been a rainbow of mushrooms, and fairy rings everywhere.

Muscadines are ripe and jucy now.....as we walked this morning, we pulled them from the vines and popped them in our mouths......they were sugary sweet.....their colors range from deepest of purples to golden bronze.

I envy my friends out west in the desert, I see where there has been some rain.......nothing prettier than the wild flowers blooming in the desert.

Too much food tonight, my brain is mush.......time to call it a day.
For those of you who are off tomorrow, enjoy your holiday!
Goodnight, Sweet dreams

September 1

September 1st,  three months away from 2013........it is a fact of life, something happens as you age, and time does move faster.  There are still 24 hours a day, still 12 months in a year, but somehow.....time becomes condensed.  Rick looked at me yesterday and remarked about what a strange year this has been......and it has, because so many days have been spent at medical facilities, seeing doctors, tests, etc.  It has been a very different year for both of us.

September 1st,  almost 90 degrees today, and the monsoons did their thing......at times blinding rain, then blazing sun, then pouring rain again.

September 1st,  football season started this week.....Rick is in heaven......he loves high school and college football as much as anyone I have ever known.  So far tonight, Alabama is rolling over Michigan and he is smiling.

September 1st, time to reassess my closet, and think about fall and winter clothes ( my favorites).
It will be a awhile before it is sweater weather, but I am dreaming of that first day of wearing boots and a sweater!

September 1st, the apples on our tree will be ready to pick in a few weeks, so will my one lonely pomegranate....and by the end of the month our great room will look like a forest.  We'll move the trees and plants in the house....and probably a couple of creatures.

September 1st, ten days away from September 11, a day that none of us can forget, won't forget, should never forget.

September 1st, summer is refusing to leave, yet the signs of fall are coming quickly.....color already beginning to show in some of the trees, days getting shorter, sunsets becoming more vivid.  Hope you are enjoying your Labor Day Holiday.
Goodnight, Sweet dreams