Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Treatment #13

Treatment #13.......the start of a second year of treatments.  Who knew that green chair would become such a part of my life?

The infusion room was packed today, not an empty chair or bed......people waiting for shots and drips.  The nurses were stressed, people were sick......yet there was a calmness that permeated the air.  All of us knew in good time everyone would be taken care of, all would receive what they needed.

My chair buddy from last time is not so well, she sat beside me today........I see the changes taking place,  the sparkle leaving her eyes.......she is such a vibrant lively woman, fading.

I am exhausted, it seems a great deal of my energy these days goes toward keeping my body warm.
I am always cold,  today I had two blankets.......I never got warm.  But, I could be so much worse.

Sitting in that big green chair, I have seen worse......and I know what it looks like.  But, there was laughter too,  you have to laugh and is a reminder that we are all human, grasping at life.
There are hugs, and blessings and prayers.......and no matter how bad you feel when you leave, you know everyone in that room is cheering for you, hoping for you........hoping for themselves.

It is strange, I feel an odd belonging, a sense of camaraderie to that room, those chairs, the patients and the nurses.  It is hard to explain, it sounds a little crazy......but for now, I know that I am where I am supposed to be.  I feel protective of that place, those green chairs and the people who sit in them.
A year ago seems so far away now, the green chairs no longer alien.

Please send good thoughts and prayers and love to those who sit in the big green prayer, one day......we can have a big old bonfire and send those green chairs where they belong.


  1. I lost my husband to lymphoma so I have observed first hand what you are going through. My thoughts and prayers are with you!


  2. My hubby has had carcinoid syndrome for about 20 years. He doesn't sit in the chairs but gets a special shot every month at the hospital. My prayers do go out to those who feel weak and ill. We know what that is like. God bless.

  3. Sending you and all your comrades in chairs all the healing hugs and positive thoughts in the universe! Take care

  4. I keep you in my prayers. I'm so glad my friend Donna no longer has to sit in the chair and she's doing well. My heart goes out to everyone going through treatments...and hopefully the chairs will someday not be needed due to a cancer cure. Good wishes to you Jilda.