Friday, July 31, 2020

Season

It's been a day. This morning was spent dealing with more and more paper work and phone calls.
This afternoon we had a rough storm, torrential rain and gusty winds.  The power went off.
I reported the outage and waited.   My brother's wife, Deb came over to check on me.  As I walked her out the door, we both looked up and saw a tree limb dangling on my power lines.
At that moment an Alabama Power truck came by and Deb flagged him down.  He saw the immediate issue and then realized that other limbs were on the line as well.
He spent over an hour, cutting and removing limbs off my power lines.  When the power was restored I made sure I gave him a shout out on social media.

Between the phone calls, and the storm and the outage I have definitely cried a few tears.  This evening I cooked my first meal since the day Rick died.  Samantha has had grueling days this week on her new job with home health care and spending her off day helping me.  I made one of her and Rick's favorite meals of roast chicken and vegetables.  I truly love cooking and being back in the kitchen today was soothing and healing.

This healing/grief process is so complicated.  There are moments that I think I am stronger and things are getting better and then the flood gates open and there is a monsoon of tears falling down my cheeks and I realize I am still a basket case.  There are still so many friends that I want to talk with, but a conversation takes an incredible amount of energy. 

After the storm I walked around the property picking up small limbs and with each one telling Rick how much I miss him.  I am grateful for all who read this blog, maybe at some point in your life my words will help some of you.  But, what I am going through these days....I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.  I find myself singing that old song from the 60's Turn, Turn, Turn.  You know the one that the words are from the Bible, for everything there is a season.  This is quite a season.

8 comments:

  1. I realize my situation is not nearly what yours is. When my mother died I wanted to be the one who contacted all my children and siblings to let them know so I did. My youngest son then asked me about contacting my aunts and uncles. It had not entered my mind. As I picked up the phone I could not do it any more. My son graciously called them for me. Then as we gathered for the funeral I was busy trying to make sure everyone was okay. After a few days more than was allowed by contract I went back to work. As I walked through the door it hit me that I was an orphan. I turned around and went back home for another week. We all grieve in our own time and our own way. I continue to hold good thoughts for you.

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  2. To talk to each person and say the same thing over and over is very, very exhausting. Your friends and family understand and are there for you no matter what. Rick must have sent that hydro guy to you because how could he have just been driving by just when you were both looking at the branches? I am glad nothing touched your home. Cry when you want to and smile when you can. Take time to enjoy cooking when you can and always cuddle your doggies

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  3. Heartfelt hugs and oceans of caring continue to flow your way.
    Grief moves at its own speed. Look after yourself. Please.

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  4. it is nice to visit your house. Your day seemed hectic. We entered the mountains on our trip. loking forward to keeping up. On the road, a little rough now. JJ is driving Sherry is co pilot..
    Jack & Sherry actually on the road!

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  5. You remain in my thoughts and prayers. It is good to get back to the normal things you do after such a tragedy . I remember returning to work and for the first time ever it felt good.

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  6. My heart goes out to you and I am sure your words will help someone else through their grief too. You are a lovely, caring person and I hope each day brings you more peace. Take care.

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  7. Prayers. I have read your husband's blog--and yours for a long time...So so sorry...

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