Un-natural

We attended the funeral of one of our best friends' son today......he was twenty-six. There are no answers when a parent loses a child, no words of comfort.....there are hugs, tears and somewhere in the mix a smile or gentle memory. All you can hope for, somewhere down the road, that the hurt will ease. Over and over I heard people talk about the unfairness of death when the natural order is changed and a child dies before the parent.

It seems in my life, I have seen quite a bit of this "un-natural" order of death. I think the profound sadness of it all.......when death claims the young, is missed chances. They don't get to live the lives their parents had envisioned for them, everything is cut short, too abrupt, and everyone left........ feels cheated.

I think there is a great deal of anger when the young die. Anger because whatever potential they had, was never reached......anger, because they did not get to experience and taste all life has to offer. Death claims the young in many ways, just as it does the rest of us. Through illness, accidents, poor choices.....death waits and when the opportunity arises, swoops down like a greedy vulture to claim its prize.

I had seen our friend's son grow from a little baby to a handsome, gentle young man. He and his brother had visited our home often when they were small. With our group of friends, those who had kids brought them to every function any of us ever had. We all stood there today, broken hearted, grieving and struggling to help our friend. I think we all felt pretty useless.

Here in the south, you always hear certain phrases at funerals.......like, "God's will", or "everything happens for a reason". For myself, .......sometimes, I think bad things happen to good people.