(Jordan was here today) today, I have been a little down, today, I have had a great hair day.
Today, I was a songwriter who booked a gig for myself and a few of my songwriting buds.
Today, I did my third lesson in Little Course in Miracles. Today, I cooked soup for my mother-in-law who is in a nursing home.
So, I suppose today........I am an aunt, songwriter, daughter-in-law, student, who was a little down on herself. I am envious today, since Rick has retired he has a lot of freedom. He has been spending his days with really interesting people,visiting some wonderful places. Today I have missed the freedom of some of my past jobs.......the travel, the excitement.
I love what I do, but because of privacy issues, I go to work, leave and pretty much close the door. Because I am contract labor, I am not an employee so I miss the meetings, the connection if you will of other employees. It is the most rewarding work I have ever done, it is the most difficult.
I have accepted today has been good and today has been difficult, much like most days. The course work in Miracles is difficult, going inward, examining why I react and do the things I do,
is depressing......I am only on the third lesson and it is painful. I read a segment about illness today, in the course, and I have read this theory many times before.........illness speaks what your mind and body hold within....suppressed words, feelings come out, one way or another.
My friend Claude Thomas believes talking heals the spirit and the mind.
I accept myself today, as a little frazzled, a little depressed, a little envious, a little happy, a little tired old broad who will face tomorrow as a brand new day and do it all over again!
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Excellent post. I went through a 12 step course once and an anxiety class. It can be painful looking at the past and examining your motives, thoughts and feelings. Big stuff. I hope the course will get easier.
ReplyDeleteFirst, I'm slow. Just realized Life 101 and you go together, makes sense now :)
ReplyDeleteTwo years ago when I first became unemployed I felt many of those same emotions. Now I realize I'm where I am for a reason, I accept it. So when life gets to me and start to way, "When, why or how," I remember a reason.
Peace to you
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow
This reminds me of Sting's song A brand new day, and the most relevant lyrics would be
ReplyDeleteHow many of you people out there
Been hurt in some kind of love affair?
And how many times did you swear
That you'd never love again?
How many lonely, sleepless nights?
How many lies, how many fights?
And why would you want to
Put yourself through all of that again?
I'm so glad I'm not the only one who has days like this. Somedays you just can't help it. Here's to a much better day today and the next and the next.
ReplyDelete