Old and New

I love plants, and I have a green thumb...... courtesy of my paternal grandmother Mamie, and my mom. Tonight, I thought I would share with you all my oldest plant and my newest one. Before I share those stories with ya'll I will tell you this, when you enter our house in the winter, it is like walking into a forest. We have 14 foot ceilings in our great room and the first thing you see is a lemon tree and a grapefruit tree that touch the ceiling. Then you might notice a ten foot mango and a couple of avocado trees that are maybe eight feet tall. And all around there are various other plants, the only time I ever wish that we lived in a large house is when I need more space for the plants.

Now for the oldest plant I care for......it belonged to my mom's mother Wilma and she gave it to my mother in 1964.

It is a big old philodendron, that summers on the patio out front by the screen porch and winters in the guest room.

Its leaves are almost a foot long, the trunk is 6-8 inches in diameter. Its place of honor in the guest room is in front of the bed. Needless to say, there is not much walking around space but you do get a feel of sleeping in the outdoors. Don't panic, if you ever spend the night with us, there are nice soft deep forest green flannel sheets and big fluffy pillows. A good

night's sleep is our guarantee!

Now, the newest plant to live here, was given to me by a dear friend a few short weeks ago. Believe it or not, all these plants and no bamboo! So my friend gave me this sweet little planter with two beautiful bamboo stalks nestled in river stones.

Another cherished old plant, is a begonia that Mamie gave to my mom in the seventies and now it lives with me. I feel so special to have these treasures in my home. There is a Christmas cactus that was in full bloom when my mom made her transition and it has never bloomed since.......five years. So if any of you have suggestions on how to get her to bloom again let me know.

Of course there is a pot of shamrocks, and a kitchen window sill full of violets. I do share, the philodendron has a baby right now, that needs a new home and I have a cutting from the begonia that is rooted and ready to move in with a nice family.

There is something mystical about caring for these plants. The trees that I mentioned earlier were all started from seeds that my mom planted. I do hope that if they are all still living when I make my transition that someone will want them, and love them and care for them. They are a part of me, really a part of my heritage, of who I am.

Monday Moments

Sometimes Mondays are truly Mondays, you get out of bed and it goes down hill. Today has been a Monday full of good moments. This morning walking the dogs, the air was brisk and clean( I actually needed a jacket for the first 15 minutes or so) it felt so good to breathe and move.

Today was the birthday for a couple of good friends, so I got to send them birthday wishes.

My phone rang this morning, and it was a dear friend's voice who lives in another state, we had a wonderful conversation and the call made my day!

I got to work and had really good classes. Then at my yoga class that I teach at the local community center, I had a couple of new students and the return of one who has had some health problems. It has been a Monday filled with good moments......not the grand slam kind, but the ones that remind you it is good to be alive. Also, Rick cleaned the porch(including furniture)! wow!

I love these days, these days that are filled with good moments. I know that we love the Big Days, but in the scheme of things, it is these moments that make our lives, that remind us that we are loved and cared for. These moments create memories and connections, that give us that little extra we need on days that are not so good. Tonight as I type these words, Blackie Bear is lying at my feet waiting patiently for bedtime. This big black dog has given me so many great moments. He knows when I am sick and he never leaves my side, he keeps his best eye on me.

Tomorrow Jordan will spend the day, I know there will be lots of good moments with him.

So tonight, before you close your eyes, think about your good moments today. Be sure to say a prayer of gratitude for those moments, I hope that tomorrow brings lots of those moments for you all.

Good night, sweet dreams.

Fruits of Autumn

We took the dogs and ourselves for our morning walk, and the most delicious smell permeated the air down by the barn. It was sweet and earthy, and I could hear the chatter of a squirrel in the trees above us trying his best to scare us away. He actually dropped a couple of hickory nuts down our way in hopes of hitting one of us on the head.

I continue to look for the source of the that intoxicating smell, and then I saw the vine and the clusters of deep bronze to purple fruit. No wonder the squirrel was so angry, he wanted all those muscadine grapes for himself.

For those of you who have never had a muscadine, you have missed quite a treat. There are wild muscadine vines all over our property, but the summer has been so hot that most of the green ones had dropped off the vines. Why these had clung to the vine I have no idea, just a little gift from Mother Nature I suppose. The skins are thick but the flesh is juicy and sweet with a little bite of tartness. In years past, when the vines have been loaded, I made muscadine jelly. I am here to tell you, muscadine jelly on hot biscuits is a southern delight.

I can remember when I was just a kid, my older brothers would pick muscadines for my mom so that she could make jelly. What they never told her, they always kept a quart or so for themselves..... and they would sneak out back and make muscadine wine in a mason jar.

They would tie fishing line around the neck of the jar and then slowly lower it down into an old well out back.

I once caught them sipping the wine and they gave me a dollar not to tell our mom. I know, I was such an easy bribe, I was only 5 or 6 years old. There surely would have been hell to pay had my mom known about their wine making venture!

There were not enough of the wild grapes for jelly making today, but there were enough for a mid-walk treat. Wish I could share them with you all to night, or at least share the aroma of those warm muscadines hanging in the September sun. The apples are starting to get those deep red streaks, just a few more weeks, fresh apple pie! The last fruits of autumn for us will be persimmons......that is if the deer and raccoons don't eat them all! Just wish there had been more muscadines.

Purpose

After writing about the now and the journey this week, guess there is no way to avoid not talking about purpose. These are just my thoughts because there are incredible books out there written by some amazing writers that discuss purpose. I have students that question me about purpose, what it is and how to find it, I have friends who have talked with me about it.

I think that there are particular times in our lives when we really question our purpose. Usually we are young, and trying to find our way through the maze of early adult hood, we have suffered loss or trauma, or there are more years behind us than ahead. Since the very beginning of time, I believe that we humans have tried to figure out why we are here, what should we do.

There have been times in my life when I have known beyond a shadow of a doubt what my purpose in life was, and then other times, when I seemed to have no purpose whatsoever.

Some days I believe that our only purpose seems to be, "to treat others as you would have them treat you". If it were only that simple...........maybe it is. Some days I think, maybe I am just reading too much into this purpose stuff.

So here are some of my observations about purpose, I think for most of us, our purpose does change as our lives progress. But no matter what our purpose is at any given time, I agree with Matthew Kelly in The Rhythm Of Life, we should strive to be the best version of ourselves.

So that point taken, if you are a parent, then be the best parent you can be, if you are a student,

don't settle, do your best, if you are a writer, an artist, a friend, no matter what you are today,

maybe it is our purpose just to be the best version of who we are right now.

All my life I have wanted to achieve greatness, but then I have to question greatness in what?

I thought when I was a teenager that I could change the world. There are times when I think that a song I have had a hand in writing would bring that greatness, but maybe the greatness just comes down to how we treat our fellow man. Maybe that is where true greatness lies, where purpose is born.......just in how we treat each other and ourselves.

I think it is good to question our purpose, that questioning keeps us on our toes, keeps us accountable. Sometimes our purpose may be to save lives, to help change someone's path, to lead........and then sometimes maybe our purpose is to follow, to speak truth, to be kind and just give somebody a big hug and a smile.

The Journey

One of the things that I have to remind myself daily.......it's the journey, not the destination.

A couple of nights ago, I wrote about being in the now, how important the present is. Well along that same vein is the journey. It is so true that we allow the memories of the past and the fears of the future to cloud our vision of now, the actual journey.

Years ago I would make all these five year plans, all these yearly goals and I would do nothing but obsess about getting there. I met extraordinary people and had experiences that many just dream about, and I can assure you, that always foremost in my head at that time, was the destination, not the incredible journey that was taking place in my life.

Now, I simply write out a What Do I Want list every few weeks to gently remind me of things that I would like in my life, but every day there is a detour, and I am ok with that. The difference now and then, I obsessed, but I didn't put in the reps. Many days now I don't put in the reps, but I understand more fully the value of the journey and I truly understand the value of the reps.

The journey today has been good, difficult, and interesting. I have learned a little more about myself today and my growth. I realized today, that emotions can still sweep over me like a hurricane, but they don't own me, they don't rule me. Being in the now, keeps you focused on the journey, the breath really is everything and it is the fuel for the journey.

I keep a copy of the poems, Ithaka and Desiderata in my yoga bag. They are great maps and guides for the journey and each time I read them I am reminded of what a marvelous journey it has been so far and all that is unfolding as it should.

I let myself feel very foolish sometimes when I focus on the destination, because really in the scheme of things, the destination is death.......of the ego and the flesh. So tonight, I have read once more those poems I carry with me daily. They remind me to value my journey, to hold it dear to my heart, to feed it with my breath and to never forget it is now.

Pleasures

There are many things in life that give me pleasure(enjoyment or satisfaction). On a hot summer day, a glass of pure cold water or sweet/tart lemonade, a slice of red ripe watermelon. On a cold winter's day, homemade soup and fresh baked bread, a mug of spiced cider or hot chocolate(heavy on the marshmallows please) put a smile on my face. Autumn leaves swirling in the wind, the first daffodils of spring.......

my nephew Jordan's smile when he walks in my front door, all the dogs greeting me when I come in from work.

A warm kind hug from a friend who loves me, a call from someone whose voice I haven't heard in awhile, an e-mail from someone letting me know they were thinking of me, a comment from one of you who read this blog. It really is the little things in life that give the most pleasure, the big things that you work so hard for, they happen......and then it's over, and life goes on. But the little day to day pleasures, that is what I hold in my heart. Those are the things that lift my spirit, that leave me feeling so grateful that I am alive.

Since I am rereading The Power of Now(for the 4th time) I am reminded of the fact that it really is the journey, not the destination. The journey is taking place now, it is the interaction of all things good and bad, the sweet and the not so sweet. Speaking of sweet, every night after dinner, Rick and I have a piece of dark luscious chocolate. You know the kind, that melts on your tongue ever so slowly, that has the body and richness of a mellow Cabernet. I eat very little sugar, but that dark chocolate, that is one of my guilty little pleasures and I savor every bite of that small square.

Life is full of pleasures when you think about it, a long hot bath after a long day. Clean fresh sheets, a good book, a great movie, an evening with friends or family, a lick on the face from a happy dog, a meal that is shared, a walk through the woods, watching the sunset, seeing shooting stars stream across the night sky.

The words I Love You, spoken from the heart, shared giggles and shared tears, knowing that you are cared about, when deep down in your heart you don't feel very lovable. A good night's sleep and a nap on a rainy afternoon, the smell of rain on dry dirt, the first snowfall of the winter and how clean the air smells, and all the colors of grey as the snow gently drifts down to earth.

So tonight, my friends, think about your pleasures, maybe it's the way your partner kisses your lips as though they were fragile crystal, or Sunday waffles, or the smell of fresh coffee in the early morning light. When you allow yourself to list all those little pleasures, the list really grows, I could keep going for sometime. The next time you have a bad day, list your pleasures,

that day will get better, I promise.

NOW

Before we started our yoga classes today, I read from Eckhart Tolle's "The Power Of Now". I have read this book at least three times, and am on my third copy, because I keep giving it away.

It is also on my recommended reading list I give to my yoga students. I wanted to share Tolles' thoughts about the now and the future with my students, it seemed to be the right time, and judging from comments that were made after class it was something some of them needed to hear.

Many times when I talk about living in the now, living in the present, students eyes glaze over.

It is such a simple concept, yet so difficult to grasp. We are so geared to think about everything but now. We wag our pasts around, reliving our tragedies, our sorrow, our use to be and what might have beens. We worry and project about our futures, thinking so foolishly that we can control them. And what happens between dwelling in the past, and constantly looking into the future, we miss out on right now.

Tolle talks about the past as a memory trace, stowed in the mind, it is a former now.....when you remember the past, you just reactivate a memory trace. He calls the future, an imagined now, a projection of the mind. He reminds us that when we think about the future, we do it now. That the past and the future have no reality of their own. He compares them to the moon, and just as the moon has no light of its own, it only reflects the light of the sun. The reality of the past and the future are "borrowed" from the now.

I believe that our pasts help to shape who we are now, and the experience helps us face the future. But we cannot let the weight or the glories of the past take away our now. Just like we cannot allow our worries or projections about the future to overshadow our present.

How many of us take just moments each day to really be present??? Do we feel the wind or the warmth from the sun? Do we acknowledge people as we pass them on the street? Do we know if there are flowers blooming, when is the last time we listened to a bird sing? Do we know what our partner was wearing when they left for work this morning? When' s the last time we noticed the texture and taste and smell of the food we were eating. When you took your morning shower, how did the water feel as it washed against your skin, what did your soap smell like?

One of the saddest things anyone ever said to me, was several years ago at a class reunion.

I was talking to someone I had graduated from high school with, and on the outside it appeared that life had been very kind to them. They were married, with children, successful in business, known throughout their community. But as we stood there and talked, this person made the remark to me that the best time of their life had been in high school.........now this was some 15 years or so later. The question that kept running through my mind, what is wrong with you,

can't you see, the life you have.....all you are doing is reliving your memories, taking them around like baggage, living in your past while the present whizzes by.

I think gratitude plays a big role, in our ability to let go of the past, and live in the now. So, maybe a few years ago, we were younger, and stronger and better looking and more popular and faster and you fill in the rest of the blanks! But what about now, hopefully you have learned something, you have experienced love, and sadness, and all those emotions in between. Life is fleeting, and none of us are promised a future, all we have is right now.

So stop beating yourself up over what might have been, and stop sweating about what might happen tomorrow. It truly is all about now. Find one thing to tonight to be grateful about, and when you wake up tomorrow morning, find one more thing to be grateful for. Gratitude will bring you joy, and for many of us, it is time we gave ourselves permission to have joy and peace in our hearts NOW!